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Active micro-Bloggers about self exploration
I'm in a space right now where I recognize that the things that are for me will work out whether I put in 10% or 100% and the things that are not for me will dissipate even if I give it 110% It's a bit of a tough space to be in because sometimes we create things that we wholeheartedly believe in and when it's not cosigned or doesn't pick up in the way you hoped AND you've given it all of your energy, it can be hard to lay to rest. However, I think it's important to recognize when we have been beating a dead horse and it's time to simply move on and try something new. We gotta be okay with allowing things to end lovingly and pick them back up when the time is right. Personally, I have felt that I've been beating a dead horse when it comes to Broken Heals coaching. I've struggled with offering my services and I've often just wanted to help people rather than seek financial abundance for my efforts. This has been a challenge I've been facing for more than 3 years, where society is constantly telling you to live your dreams, know your worth and charge tax meanwhile many of the women that I have worked with could not afford to pay even a minimum amount due to the circumstances that they are in. I've been at this game for over 5 years before healing became the trend that it is now. It's a lot to spend your time, energy and resources holding someone's hand for months on end and they just don't want to do the work - and I'm not even blaming them because healing ain't no simple thing. Healing has no end date. It's a long, arduous process that requires you to take charge of where you're at and do something about it and that shit is scary. And with the trend that's in now, people would still rather TALK about healing, than actually DO the work. But don't get me wrong, coaching hasn't been all draining - I've built amazing connections, I've helped a lot of women take steps towards their healing and I've grown and healed myself along this journey and I believe that that in itself has been extremely rewarding. With that being said, I'm trying something new. I'll be offering Healing Plan Consultations - you tell me what you need help with, I create a plan for you, you do what you can with the plan, we do check-ins over the course of 90 days and go from there. This is your first step to healing, your first step to doing rather than thinking or speaking on it. This is especially helpful for those that are still a little nervous diving into therapy. Holla at your girl. Like I said, 10% or 110% it don't matter, we give it what we got and it's gonna work or it's not.
Spiritual Progress - Physical Discomfort
There is a prevalent misconception that we need to go to the Himalayas and sleep on hard floors to make spiritual progress. That is helpful for some people, but not all. We can make spiritual progress in our own home sitting on our comfortable, soft beds. Spirituality has nothing to do with physical discomfort, it has to do with quieting our mind, which we can do right now in our homes. “At your core, you are peace. Be who you are. Be Peace.” – Ravi Kathuria, “Happy Soul. Hungry Mind.”
Hi there, I'm Haylee!
Welcome to my page, it's lovely to e-meet you! Here you'll find various entries about the things I find interesting (which is mainly why we do the things we do!) and a bit about my own personal journey of self-development. First thing's first, who am I and why am I called the @thehsphelper...? Well long story short, I moved countries a couple of years ago and was metaphorically stripped of all the things I thought created my 'identity'. For the first time ever, I was stuck with myself without all the distractions of hobbies, studying, work, friends, family, and the likes ANDDD I didn't like my own company very much! I fell into depression and subsequently went through a period of self-healing, self-discovery, and self-development. Through all this self-exploration, I learned that I was a 'Highly Sensitive Person' (it's a science thing, really!) which explained A LOT about why I did and didn't like certain things and why and I did and didn't do, certain things. It made me realize, just how easy it can be to live life without really questioning who we are inside. After this revelation, I felt the need to create a page to spread info about what a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) is, but this page how has now evolved to a page about questioning our habits and behaviors as well. So here you have me, the HSP Helper ;) And my VISION is this: I want to help others to uncover their own authentic identities, just like I did, by questioning current habits, issues and behaviors to make sure these things are empowering rather than disempowering! I hope to do this through educating, teaching and healing people. Why is this my vision? I BELIEVE OUR HABITS DRIVE OUR LIFE AND WE NEED TO QUESTION THEM IN ORDER TO BECOME THE DRIVERS OF OUR OWN LIVES! I decided a long time ago that I was tired of running on auto-pilot and so my continually aim is to ensure auto-pilot is turned of and that I am the driver of my plane (my life). In addition, I'm all about people accepting and owning their flaws, habits, behaviors and issues and I'm also all about people seeking professional help for these issues too. But where's the in-between? There aren't enough resources out there to help people who simply want to explore and question their own identities. We don't necessarily want to go to therapy about an issue/habit/behavior, but we simply want to know WHY the issue/habit/behavior exists in order to do our own healing or development - this is from my own experience of therapy! So think of me as a support, whilst you walk the path of self-discovery, self-healing and self-development. I believe we all deserve to have the tools to heal ourselves (learning how to fish) instead of being the recipient of healing from someone else (being given a fish). So I hope this page and my Instagram can teach you how to fish, I mean, heal yourself. Look out for upcoming entries about the particular habits I'm working on (including procrastination, perfectionism, self-sabotage - just to name a few!). I'll also try to provide some more practical and educational entries about why we do the things we do so that we can heal and develop together. Lots of Love, Haylee x
Quick lunch meditations
I'm trying to take on this new habit of doing quick 10 min meditations every day at lunch break. I want to do this regularly to be able to clarify my thoughts, and take better decisions by clearing all the noise that could have accumulated during the busy morning. I've done these quick meditations a few times before, and I could feel a huge difference in my afternoons as they became more relaxed and focused. I was also a lot more calm and receptive towards other people, as my thoughts were not always on top of my mind when talking to them. I realized that minds have a certain amount of bandwidth they can process, and can be quickly over-saturated with the hundreds of informations and decisions we take every day.
Why I prefer to hike solo
Most of the epic hikes I've done in my life, I've done them alone. People are surprised when I mention this, because hiking solo is not something that people do often. On the trails as well, almost all the hikers I come across are surprised to see me all alone. Last week I did one of the most incredible hikes to date, in Watersprite Lake, Squamish - Canada, and I knew I had to share the unknown yet incredibly soothing aspects of hiking solo. When you walk alone for hours and hours, your mind goes nuts. It grabs every bit of thought it can, and circles around constantly. It picks up the recent events of your life, digs out the old memories, and pretty much every scar that did not heal properly. Lately, I had so much going on on my plate: work was incredibly stressful, my love relationship had been dragging me down and I I had the sense of losing grip and control over my life as a 30 year old young adult... One hour into the wild, and my mind started to take each thought that passed through. I started to evaluate how they made me feel, how they affected me, and then I try to let them go. I find it to be an incredible powerful meditation. It heals what has been buried and therefore not processed properly. It brings clarity to evaluate yourself and learn to grow. These things are almost impossible to do in the constant noise of every day life. I came back home the same day, feeling at peace and intensely relieved. I had ideas and solutions for my challenges at work, and a emotional clarity in my love life. Sure it's a bit scary to walk for 8h by myself in the mountains. You're never sure how long there is left to finish the trail. What if something bad happens? But you learn to rely on your senses, to analyze things and take the smart decisions to keep going or to stop, as you rely completely on yourself. If you've never done it before, solo hiking will feel very uncomfortable the first time. It can feel awkward and as if you were being judged. But Nature does not judge and welcomes you at all time. I hope you get to experience this immense breath of fresh hair for the mind and soul. Happy trails everyone !
Yoga = Union
I never thought I would be a person who did yoga every day. "Obsessive", I thought. "How much time do those people have?" But then I discovered short, manageable at-home yoga videos on Youtube with "Yoga with Adriene". I tried a 30-day yoga journey in January 2018...and I never stopped. Having an objective with yoga is a weird concept. In my normal life, everything is objective focused. But yoga is "experience-focused" - something that I often struggle to engage. It's not about how I feel at the end or what I do after - it's about actually being able to click in and enjoy the experience. But of course...things do change. I feel more confident and comfortable in my body than I ever had before - even though I physically look very similar. I can do cartwheels and headstands. I can stand up from sitting cross-legged on the floor without using my hands. I used to feel a bit like a head with a body that I needed to manage. Previous attempts to move more or exercise regularly were always focused on "enduring" some unpleasant activity to get positive outcomes at the end. But now, I feel much more CONNECTED to my body. I understand that I move and stretch my body daily to work WITH it, not ON it, and I ensure that I do activities that I enjoy during and after. (I've recently added weekly Zumba, in that same strain.)
Why I Felt Bad for Not Tipping a Rude Waitress
I organized a dinner with a small group of friends at a mexican restaurant to celebrate my 30th birthday. The waitress - probably a college student working as a temp - who took care of us was incredibly nice with me but was insulting with one of my friends (for no reason). That said, she did a great job at serving our food, cocktails and everything… while being incredibly rude to my friend. My friends paid for the meal but I asked them not to give her any tips… The problem is that I shouldn’t ask my friends about what tips they are going to give to someone, especially since they are offering me dinner. Also, giving tips is something very personal so anyone should be able to do whatever he / she wants. If that was to happen again, I would simply talk to the waitress telling her that she was rude to my friend and that was not acceptable. This situation made me realize that you should always tip someone. Even if you’re pissed at your waiter / waitress, they had a long day of work, they deserve at least 10%. Leaving nothing is basically insulting someone and not paying them for their work.
Celebrate Your Wins in Public, Complain in Private
Long story short, I’m working on a big project at work that requires my full attention. My manager gave me a very short deadline and I feel like that any minute I’m not at my desk, I’m just wasting my time. When I focus on something, I just put my noise-cancelling headset, eat at my desk and don’t talk to anyone. One of my colleagues told me once that I was killing the mood at work because of my attitude. By not engaging with my teammates, taking lunch or coffee breaks or laughing at their jokes… I answered him that his jokes wouldn’t pay my rent and he should do the same. I said it pretty loud in the office space and people started to give me stern look. If that was to happen again, I would make sure to start a private conversation with my colleague explaining that I’m stressed out about this project and that’s why I need my full attention. Also, I’d probably talk to my manager about how insane this deadline is. This situation made me realize that you should be mindful of how you deliver your message in public. If you complain about something, try to keep it in small groups, not in a public space. That tends to affect the esprit de corps of a company.
The gift of life
In May 2018, I decided to get tested to donate my kidney. I knew someone in need of a new kidney and had never considered living organ donation until this time of my life. After doing some thorough research and realizing that I can live a perfectly normal life with just one kidney, I didn't think twice. Something inside of me told me it was meant to be. I was not related to this person and her hopes of me being a match were really slim. I would say she didn't believe it would work out. Well, as I went through the tests, I met every single criterion and checked every box. We were both a bit in shock. I was even told my kidneys were on the larger side for a woman my size, which confirmed I was made for this as I had super kidneys! ;) The process of getting tested was a bit lengthy and required me to travel to CT since that's where the recipient was located. They had to see me in-person to perform final tests. They also required that I meet with a Social Worker to make sure I was doing this for the right reasons. Once I cleared those tests, we scheduled the surgery for 2 weeks later, on December 18th, 2018. It felt surreal that we finally had a date on the books! The surgery prep was a bit brutal for me, I had to be on a liquid diet for 2 days before the surgery, so by day 3, I felt like crap! I couldn't wait to be put under to not feel so crappy anymore. I had to be admitted 1 hour earlier than the recipient. This was my very first surgery, so I was nervous of course. I was not familiar with hospitals or being hooked up to machines, so my heart rate was increasing as I knew the surgery time was approaching. The entire staff was incredibly kind and supportive. They realized that to donate an organ you have to be healthy and are not used to hospitals! The first team that came to me was the team that did a nerve block on my abdomen, that was very intimidating and couldn't have gone better. They, of course, gave me a little something to make me feel "good". After that, they rolled me to the operating room where I was put under very quickly after. They then brought in the recipient and performed the organ transfer. The kidney started working immediately! We were both in recovery at the same time, where I felt quite out of it and also high on life. I couldn't believe what had just happened. A team of brilliant medical professionals had carefully extracted one of my vital organs and transferred it into someone else who is getting another chance at life. Almost a year later, I am 7 months pregnant with a very healthy baby boy who has two working kidneys. I think this baby is a gift for having given the gift life last December <3 I currently have 3 working kidneys in my body! ;)
This is How I Feel After I've Quit Smoking
Today, I decided to quit smoking. I’m addicted to nicotine and I want to stop because it has terrible effects on my skin, my hair, my breath, my lungs and my mood. When I don’t smoke for a few hours, I become despicable to the people around me. The day I realized I needed to quit for good was a month ago. I was at a conference and I had to attend to every keynotes, round tables and speeches since I was representing the main sponsor of that event. I couldn’t smoke a single cigarette. At the end of this very long day, my partner picked me up so we could have a nice dinner together. I barely had the time to smoke one cigarette so I was pretty stressed out. The entire dinner was a shit show. I just got pissed off for no reason and he had to « take it for the team » you know. I basically yelled at him in front of strangers for stupid reasons, just because I was deprived of nicotine. It’s been a month now without a cigarette. I felt terrible the first week since I felt the urge to smoke, basically every hour. Even now and then, I sometimes want to get a cigarette but I behave. That said, stopping nicotine helped me feeling better. My skin, my teeth, my breath and my hair looks a bit brighter and I don’t smell like cigarette all the time. My partner also noticed that, apart from the first week, I was more relaxed at home. If you want to stop, there is no miracle. You have to be self-disciplined. Replace your « smoking time » with another activity. For me yoga and meditation have been very helpful. It doesn’t have to be these activities, but find yourself that can replace your habit to smoke.
I Just Ran 10k for the First Time And I Feel Invincible
Today, I ran 10k in preparation of the half marathon I’m running in October. I’ve never run a 10k in my life, this was my first time. It gave me hope that I could actually finish my half marathon. For this 10k, I made sure to prepare well. I ate a light breakfast, drank a lot of water and warmed up extensively. I think the most important thing was the pep talk I gave myself. I told myself that I could do it, that when things get hard it’s probably gonna hurt for a few minutes before the pain goes away. And that I shouldn’t stop at any cost. I feel empowered! When I signed up to the half-marathon a couple of months ago, my main objective was to finish it. With my progress, I can legitimately set myself a time as a goal.
Why I moved to Vancouver, Canada
I left Paris 2 years ago to explore North America. I had no idea I would end up in Vancouver, but after 48h I fell in love with this place. Most of the people who move to Vancouver stay because of the incredible Nature. Mountains, beaches, ski, hiking.. All 30 min from downtown !